I was just sent this information:
On 96.5 radio news today the story was U of M saying there's a shortage of lab techs and how important "these professionals" are when trying to get quick results tracking the H1N1 flu. She said there's not enough trained people now that the older techs are retiring, plus the aging population that needs more lab tests.
Here's my list of demands:
1. Treat the lab staff with the respect they deserve. From the phlebotomist up.
2. Know that I am not a God damn phlebotomist. I mean you no disrespect phlebotomists of the world. But really people, really.
Typical duties as a medical lab tech will likely include the following:
- Monitoring tests and procedures
- Preparing blood, urine and tissue specimens for analysis
- Using sophisticated laboratory equipment to look for bacteria, parasites and other microorganisms
- Analyzing the chemical content of fluids
- Matching blood for transfusions
- Testing for drug levels in the blood to show how a patient is responding to treatment
They may specialize in the areas of chemistry, hematology, cytotechnology, immunology, virology, blood banking or microbiology. *info taken from this site
3.Sign on Bonus.
Yeah, I'm holding out for a sign on bonus. If there is such a shortage, show me the money. Nurses, eh, also a 2 year degree, get $5000 minimum. Want to stop hearing me whine about a flat screen tv and working volume control, let's talk sign on bonus.
It says "sophisticated laboratory equipment" I can run that, work that, and analyze your blood, urine, semen (if you've got it) stool, cerebral spinal fluid, on that, if and when I want to. Well, if you treat me right.
Until then, I might go give it away for free at the Kalamazoo Free Clinic.Ooooh, due to my research assistant work with Shelly Field I may be most skilled primate parasitologist in the state of Michigan. Yeah. Top that. I have mad skillz.
(Any of you call me a phlebotomist again, it's not going to be pretty. Really. 2 years of school, show me some respect.)