Because I like to do stupid things, I decided to clean the ceiling fan blades in my bedroom. Oh, did I mention I hate spending money on things I know I can "get for cheaper" or "do myself?" Yeah, this in fact lead to awesome.
So while I was standing on the stool on top of my bed that I took out of the garbage while in Shipshewana, I needed help. Oh, you don't know Shipshewana? It's in Indiana. Amish country friends. I have a counter stool that was no longer good enough for the thrifty, "buttons are too flashy" Amish. I asked Pig 3 (he's 4) to hand me the broom. No, no. I did not pay the $10 to buy an adjustable duster on a stick, I had the broom. The same broom that I recently swept the garage out with-sanitary.
As I started to wobble, I again asked Pig 3 a question "Hey, you do know how to dial 911, right?"
"I'm not supposed to mess with the God damn phone, I might accidentally call 911."
"Right. Could you hold the stool for me."
I now have a very clean ceiling fan, and a Pig with excellent attention to detail.