Wednesday, August 29, 2007

More Love, No, More Snot for Kat

Here is the Noro bag that I knit in January of this year from the book Noro Revisited. If you check out the blog post from that time it looks like I used it as some sort of bribe along with pints of American Pie ice cream to get Kat to babysit the Pigs. Because she was in fact the owner of said purse. It was not in this condition.

If you look in the photo, and you don't have to look very closely, notice the Frankenstein style stitches holding the bag together?

Yeah, as it turns out, Kat looooved the bag. Which makes me proud, but there wasn't enough snot to hold that bad together. Turns out, it needs more snot.

So, instead, this is what I did to it. I used it as a humming bird catching device. Works too, even they are tricked by the beauty of Noro.
Allowed Berger to think he's getting a fancy bikini top for his three uttered doggy girl friend.

No, I tore, I mean very carefully took out all the crappy sewing, and I am planning to gently wash the bag, and lovingly (snottily) let it dry someplace safe away from barf, (like at a neighbor's house.)

I have also traced the bag and plan to sew, oh yes friends, I said the dreaded word to many a knitter, not crochet, I've been doing that since I was in the womb, ask PK, I was born with a scarf, (and snot.) I might even throw in a pocket.

Oh, gosh, I am talking all this smack. The last time I used the sewing machine I put the sleeve on backwards, didn't talk to anyone for days, and swore (a lot) to never sew again. That was making a 'sew easy in just 1 hour pattern.'

I was at a Fabric Store last night and asked a lady about the 1 hour patterns as I sat looking at the hunky guys in the Burda pattern books (they have no shirts on!! I don't get out much) and she laughed and said it was a marketing scam. I told her I loved her. So, if you start seeing me in more messed up outfits than I generally wear, it's not because I am all fashion fantastic, it's because nothing fits me, and I am too cheap to buy clothes that fit and I am going to start sewing potato sacks for myself.

Back to Kat's bag. I need football to start so I can get some of this done. What, you say? See, the Ogre is easily distracted. When football is on, he sits in the living room and watches football. If you put a table, a pattern, some fabric, and supplies in front of him during a football game, a completed project will be made when the game is done.

Like the crazy person I am, I ordered new satellite tv with the NFL package so we could not only get every bloody NFL game known to man, but also 4 months of free movie channels. Ok, so I think of this as win-win-win-win.

4 wins, here we go...

1. NFL=trick Ogre into sewing lining into Kat's purse.

2. NFL=trick Ogre into sewing Holly Bee something besides new potato sack wardrobe.

3. September, October, November, December, in Snowy Michigan with Movie Channels.

4. Recorded movies to watch January, February, March, April, May, when it' still SNOWING.

Did I mention how we ended up with Kat's purse's the super quick version:

I met up with Kathy yesterday, we were just planning on running to Menard's to pick up some blinds, and she needed some curtain rods...and Harry said he was too tired to walk. I put him in a cart. He said he was going to barf.

I thought, ok, nutrigrain bars are gross. The Menard's cashier's gave me a funny look, like I wanted to pull a shoplifting scam, then I said, "my kid thinks he's going to barf."

They suddenly switched to all super friendly and "take all you need."

That's right baby, no one likes cleaning up barf from a corner.

Anyway, he ended up barfing in the Mazda, in the bag. We ditched the bag in the park (garbage can) on 9th st, took Kat home, and have shut the windows to keep the neighborhood safe from our insane germs and have been watching movies with him passed out on the couch ever since.

Another excellent reason for getting better tv. Trapped in the house for 2 weeks worth of sick kids is making me, well, clean the darn house. I hate it.

But Kat's bag is gonna be Awesome. Hey, Interweave, this is so Snot-tastically knitwonderful, you know you want me.


Anonymous said...

"Incoming!" blachkkkk.... lol

Holly Bee said...

Oh!!! I forgot that part! I can't believe I forgot that baby book worthy moment!

Carina said...

Of course they want you. All the publishing houses do. You should submit a proposal. :)

Good idea on having Eric sew. I hate my sewing machine and am going to make the dolls some clothes to beat back the phobia. I hope it works. If not, I'm going back to the handsewing I know and love. So there. ;)